


Nothing's Changed

by biggest_of_uwus



Series: one-shots [2]
Category: All Time Low (Band), Simple Creatures (Band)
Genre: Angst, Band Break Up, Bisexual Jack, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, Pansexual Alex, Sad Ending, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-13
Updated: 2020-07-13
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:41:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25239391
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/biggest_of_uwus/pseuds/biggest_of_uwus
Summary: based off of the song "hurts like hell" by Wrabel.
Relationships: Alex Gaskarth/Original Male Character(s), Jack Barakat/Alex Gaskarth, Jack Barakat/Original Male Character(s)
Series: one-shots [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2056974
Comments: 1
Kudos: 7





	Nothing's Changed

**Author's Note:**

> alex's point of view

**It's been two years**

**Eight months and a day**

**Walking 'round in New York in the rain**

**And right now I'm a walking cliché**

**It's been two years**

**Eight months, nothing's changed**

Alex looked outside of the record store, the rain was beginning to fall. _great_ , he thought to himself. _I'll need to buy a bag_.

he brought the vinyls he picked out to the register. Amy Winehouse, Blink-182, and Britney Spears. it was like he was trying to make himself think of Jack.

the two had broken up almost three years before. Well, two years and a day over eight months, not that Alex had been counting. With the breakup between Alex and Jack, the band was bound to break up soon after. Alex still had simple creatures, which had their latest single go platinum. He was fine on money and a job, but the void that was once filled with so much love and excitement and joy and everything good was slowly taking him over.

the cashier handed Alex his bag and a receipt, and with a small thank you, he left the shop.

everything was the same. maybe not the world or the political climate or the people that were present in Alex’s life, but everything that Alex felt was and has been the same ever since he and Jack broke up. it was his fault, too. 

Jack was right to leave after he saw Alex snap at everyone, then refuse the help anyone offered. he was right to leave after being around Alex was so draining because he would dump all of his problems onto Jack. he was right to say they needed to break up because they were only dragging each other down, but Alex would do anything to change how he was back then. Instead, he was stuck in an over-priced apartment in New York, pushing out the same sorry lyrics as he was 2 and ⅔s years before, trying to find someone that could help him get better. 

he felt like he was in slow motion, while the rest of the world kept spinning faster and faster and faster. truth be told, he wanted off the ride.

**I'm out here trying to love somebody**

**I tell myself I'm doing well**

**But every time I think about you**

**It still hurts like hell**

Alex found himself staring at the door of his apartment complex. _dissociated, I guess_. he stood for a second longer until he heard someone call out.

“excuse me, are you okay?”

Alex turned around to see a man in his early thirties staring back at him. He had dark brown eyes _like Jack’s_ , bleached hair _like Jack's_ , and light tan-olive skin _like Jack’s_. 

“Yeah,” Alex said, his voice crackling.

“You were just standing there for almost three minutes, are you sure?” the man’s voice mixed with the sound of the rain, making it sound like a perfect storm.

 _Baz hated storms_. The thought of his old dog brought back all the memories of Baz snuggling up to Alex and Jack, who would hold him close and turn on a movie to try to drown out the noise. the memory made Alex’s eyes water

“Not really,” he said, voice even weaker than before.

the man pursed his lips and furrowed his brows _like Jack would do_. Alex was ushered up to his apartment, and as soon as he got there he started crying like it was all he knew. 

The man somehow calmed him down and got him talking about astronomy. Alex learned his name was Ty, and he was a psychologist, which made sense. Soon he had to leave but he left Alex with his number.

Alex ended up calling Ty a few days later, asking if he wanted to go to a bar with him, and Ty agreed.

The two found themselves climbing the stairs to Alex's apartment, their lips clasped together and their hands glued to the other. Once they reached Alex's bedroom, he stopped. He hadn’t been with anyone since Jack, and Ty reminded him so much of his former bandmate. 

he collapsed to the floor crying, using his half removed shirt to cover his face. _I can’t stop thinking of him, why can’t I stop thinking about him?_

**Where'd you meet?**

**Where's he from? What's his name?**

**Does he touch, does he love you the same?**

**And I know I'm a walking cliché**

**It's been two years**

**Eight months and nothing's changed**

It was a few days after the incident with Ty, but he understood and loved Alex all the same. 

_I might finally be moving on_ , he thought, walking up to the conference room to talk about sales and marketing for simple creatures. he got a message from Instagram

_**JackBarakat** posted a photo_

Alex opened it to see Jack with his arm around another man, who was kissing his cheek. the caption said “happy national coming out day from jack bi-rakat”

any other picture and Alex might have laughed at the caption. maybe he would’ve texted Jack to say he was proud of him for coming out, but that picture just meant that Jack found someone new.

 _Why should I care? I found someone who cares about me and I might learn to love_. He thought, but no. all he could think was _who is this guy? When did they get together? How did they get together?_

He saved the questions for later and ran up to the meeting.

it was slow, but eventually, he got out and texted Rian.

did you know about this?

[picture]

Rian didn’t answer in the two seconds Alex had the patience for, so he texted Zack the same thing. soon he got some replies.

Rian: mason? yeah, he and Jack have been dating for over a year, how did you not know?

Zack: yeah, I thought he told you?

Alex sighed and made his way to the bathrooms, not wanting to look like he was about to fall apart in public. he clicked Rian’s contact and called him.

After a couple of rings, he picked up.

“hey Alex”

“don’t fucking ‘hey Alex’ me. When were you going to tell me Jack got a boyfriend? and you know him?” Alex was furious. these people were supposed to update him on Jack, or at least he thought they were. 

“hey, I was the one who introduced them to each other, and Jack asked for Zack and me not to tell you because he was going to do it himself. we thought he told you, okay? chill.” Rian’s voice sounded the same as when Alex and Jack argued for the last time. 

Alex leaned back against the bathroom stall “can, um,” he started “can you ask him if we can meet up sometime? to talk about what happened?”

Rian sighed on the other end “Alex, he moved on. I thought you were too, you texted me and Zack that picture of your new boyfriend-”

“he’s not my boyfriend”  
“whatever. he seems to make you happy, so please try with him? It's like nothing has changed since you and Jack broke up. I mean, everything changed, but the feeling has just stuck. I guess I’m finally moving on from the band, so is Zack, and Jack’s finally moving on from you. I think it’s time you catch up.”

**By now you're probably loving somebody**

**By now you're probably doing well**

**But every time I think about you**

**It still hurts like hell**

About two months later, it was Alex’s birthday. he and Ty were dating and sometimes things seemed to look up. 

Ty had gone out of his way and set up an amazing party. it wasn’t anything crazy, just some wine, catering, a nice cake, and his closest family and friends.

everything was looking up until the birthday posts started to flood in. He got the regular things from Zack, Rian, and Mark, then some from old crew members, and lots of messages from his family. then he saw that Jack posted on Instagram.

_**JackBarakat** : happy birthday to one of my oldest friends. I know we haven’t talked in years, and for good reasons, but that doesn’t mean you don’t deserve all the amazing things you get. Happy birthday, Alex, I miss you. _

Alex’s eyes were watering from just reading the paragraph, but when he looked through the pictures it sent him over the edge. high school yearbook photos, photos from concerts, them being their old fun selves on the bus, and finally one where the two were practically sleeping on top of each other from after a concert. 

Alex excused himself and headed to his bedroom. He sat in the dim room, staring at the last photo until tears were falling all over his phone screen. He grabbed a pillow and continued sobbing into it when Ty came in.

“Hey hon,” he said, rubbing circles into Alex's back. “Do you want me to ask the guests to leave? I'm sure they’d understand.”

Alex thought for a moment then nodded.

“I'll go tell them, be right back” Ty got up, and started walking to the door, then paused. “and Alex? I love you so much.”

Alex cracked a small smile. “I know you do.”

after everyone left Alex spilled everything he was thinking about. how he and Jack used to date, how envious he was of Jack being able to be so proud, how envious he was of Mason, how he loved Jack but loves Ty, how much he misses the band. 

“you should call him,” Ty said after Alex finished.

“hm?”

“yeah, I mean, you two obviously have things you need to talk about, and I’m surprised you two have gone so long without talking. I know you say you don’t want to, but it’s obvious you do.”

“stupid psychologist boyfriend knowing stupid psychology,” Alex muttered.

“what was that?” Ty said, smirking at Alex.

the two fell back in laughter, failing to contain their giggles about the dumb joke. Soon, they were cuddled up against each other, listening to the sound of their breathing and the New York traffic.

“it’s just that whenever I think about him, it just reminds me of everything we had, and it hurts,” Alex said softly.

“that’s okay.”

**I close my eyes**

**You're here in my mind**

**I close my eyes**

**You're here for a while**

the phone line rang. Alex had texted Jack, just minutes before, and Jack responded. maybe it was that it seemed like every second was a day and every ring went on a second longer than the last. but on the fourth ring, Jack picked up. 

Neither of them said anything. they both had practiced what they’d first say to the other a million times before, but neither could bring themselves to say a single thing.

“hi,” Alex eventually said.

“hi.” They were silent for another minute.

“um, where should I start,” Alex said. a soft _dunno_ came from the other line. “okay…”

they talked for almost two hours, catching up on each other's lives, re-learning everything they knew about each other, missing the band.

they were about to say their goodbyes when Alex jumped in “I, um, I miss you, a lot. like when I close my eyes I can still remember us together, I can still remember you. I just wish we could see each other in real life again, you know?”

“yeah, I know.”

“so would you want to come over to new york? you can bring Mason and I can get Ty and we could go get dinner, like a double date. I could invite Zack and Rian over too, we could talk about a reunion, maybe.” Alex bit his lip, only half realizing what he had said.

“Yeah,” Jack said. “yeah, I’d like that. as long as you pay for the plane tickets, this better be all expenses paid or I’m not doing it.”

“fuck you!” Alex said laughing. “I’m being nice here, okay?”

**It still hurts like hell**

“reservation for four, under Gaskarth?” Alex said to the hostess. she nodded and led them to their table, handing them their menus.

“This place is fucking insane Alex,” Jack said, Mason nodding along next to him. 

Alex chuckled. “Yeah, Ty picked it out. He has the best taste in restaurants so I trust him on this.” he looked over at Ty, who was blushing. “Anyway, what do you do Mason?”

“I’m a model,” he replied.

“ah that makes sense, Jack’s standards are through the roof.” they all laughed as Jack stammered to correct Alex. 

they talked for a while longer until Jack asked if he and Alex could talk in private. Once they reached the bathrooms, Alex noticed how Jack was rocking back and forth on his feet more than usual.

“you alright?” Alex said, grabbing Jack’s shoulders. Jack kept his gaze on the floor.

“I, um, I was wondering if I could get your advice on something?” Alex nodded “so I got this ring for mas-”  
“holy shit!” Alex yelled, cutting Jack off, who looked up at him and huffed out a breath. “oh sorry, continue.” 

“so I was wondering where I should propose to him, I mean, it’s a good opportunity and there’s some nice places here, and I just want to make it good.” 

Alex winced slightly and took his hands off Jack’s shoulders. _maybe we could have been like this if i hadn’t fucked it up,_ he thought.

“honestly,” Alex started. “I didn’t think you’d be the one proposing,” he said in an attempt to lighten the mood. “but really, I can ask Ty if he has any suggestions, I wasn’t joking when I said he has amazing taste.” 

“thank you,” Jack said, finally looking into Alex’s eyes.

Alex stared back, it hurt knowing Jack would never be his again, but fuck it, he wanted one more taste. 

he brought his hand up to Jack’s face and slowly moved until I felt as if their lips were atoms away from each other. Jack stood unmoving as if he was mesmerized, but he suddenly snapped out of it and pushed Alex away.

“don’t-” Jack began. “don’t fucking do that. I love Mason and you clearly love Ty. it hurts for me too, seeing you with someone else, but if we’re ever gonna move past this and get the band back and everything, this has to stop.”

“I know, sorry.”

“I’m gonna- I’m going back to the table. I’m sorry.”

Jack left the bathroom, leaving Alex leaning against the counter, tears welling in his eyes. he splashed water in his face and watched as it dripped off.

“I wish nothing had changed.”

**It still hurts like hell**

**Author's Note:**

> hi guys, sorry I haven't posted in such a long time, I've been going through a bit of a rough patch. I've been working on this songfic for about a week, and though it's not great, I'm still proud of it!! I've had a bunch of chapters for Asters & Acceptance written for a while, I just needed a break. also I know I missed a bunch of capitols but I don't really care. thank you for reading, and I hope you have an amazing day/night!


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